Sorry… for being a Girl


While the entire nation is fighting against the heinous crime took place on 16th Dec’12 in the Capital of India and fighting for enforcement of strict law and safety of women, the so called “leaders” in Indian politics are making absurd comments.

gangrape-1_350_122912081535First ” Abhijeet Mukherji” ; the Congress MP and son of our very own President Pranab Mukherji, hurt the sentiments of women protesters by addressing them as “dented/painted” indirectly suggesting that those who party late, put on heavy make-up and wear fancy cloths have no rights to protest against anything unfair happening in the society, they also do not have any rights to be socially aware. I seriously don’t understand the logic behind it. If so then even our celebrities don’t have any rights to speak about any social issues. It shows how narrow minded these people are even after being educated well.

Then CMP MLA and former West Bengal minister Anisur Rahman, who went one step ahead by asking CM of West Bengal Mamta Bannerjee her charges for getting raped. If this fellow can have guts to make such comments on the CM of his state then we can only imagine how he would be treating other women in the society.

And now recently (who’s who) a senior BJP leader from Madhya Pradesh, Kailash Vijayvargiya, has asked women to be in their limits else they’ll get punished just as Sita. First of all I personally don’t find any sense why Sita was punished and secondly if there has to be any limit then it should be for both men and women. I like what Bollywood actress Priyanka Chopra stated after Delhi incident; “I may be walking naked but you still don’t have rights to rape me”. Absolutely right. Nobody and I mean nobody in this entire world has right to rape any girl/woman, no matter what she’s wearing or doing.

Some are trying to get away by blaming the western culture for such activities. But at the same time people forget that we come to know about such cases because they are reported at the first place. People in cities like Delhi or Mumbai are modern enough to stand up to fight against crime happened with women. If you think about the rural areas or villages, people feel lodging such complaints would only harm their image in society and bring them embarrassment. And even if they show some guts to do so they likely to be threatened.

If it had been the effect of westernization then there should have been more such cases in western countries and none in ancient  India. Also if you study these cases happening in cities you may find many accused are from small villages of India. So I guess by blaming western culture you are indirectly pointing finger at how girls in cities conduct themselves.

Instead of blaming any culture, be it western or eastern, you need to dig deeper to find the root cause, which is according to me is that most of the men in our society don’t treat women as a human being and an entertainment object instead. They might worship the goddesses but they lack respect towards women around them.

While we are discussing the ways to punish the culprits and safety of our women, such comments not only disturb us but also make us think, is this the average mentality of Indian men? Is this what all guys around us think about us? Our colleagues  our friends and for that matter the men in our family? Then from whom we are hiding, running away or protecting ourselves?

The scars are not yet healed and we already started getting news about rape cases in different parts of the country. And not all are illiterate or lower class people. Even the men working in MNCs are involved in such crimes showing their animal instinct and lack of respect towards women. And why to blame only the accused. We too just play the role of spectator. We don’t anything to stop the crime and don’t do anything even when the crime has happened. When the Delhi gang rape victim was thrown out of bus naked, shivering and bleeding no one even cared to cover her with shawl. We have become so numb.

I wonder whether a woman’s body is just for being used and thrown away like litter or do we actually deserve to be treated like a human being?

Delhi protest for gang-rape victimI read somewhere, “A girl is neither safe inside a womb, nor outside”. And sadly it’s a fact. Right from the female foeticide to sexual harassment they keep reminding us it’s not a good world for a girl to live. I born in a family with good values but they too don’t allow me to stay out late as my brother would, not because they discriminate between a girl and a boy but they know there’s a bad world outside and never know when and how I’ll have to pay a price of being born as a girl.

They tore me apart again


I’m angry, I’m hell angry, beyond your imagination. I’m shivering with anger. Want to cry loud, want to break things and top of everything I want to break their skulls, torture them to death, burn their skin and leave them to live a life they never ever imagined. They’ll want to die but won’t be able to. That will be the right punishment for these bastards for what they have done to an innocent soul and they have been doing it again and again.

I’m sure every single Indian mind is churning with these thoughts after that very unfortunate incident. But this is a time to act not just think. It’s a high time not only for Indian society but for entire world and entire human race, for it is not limited to one particular society, it’s an international issue. I’m not at all feeling good-by highlighting this side of my country but it’s not about country’s image it’s about the safety of women of my country and entire world.

It is a serious offence which unfortunately never have been treated that seriously. Even the death sentence is mild punishment for this crime. It’s not only physical loss but mental torture for the victim. A girl, whether she’s married or unmarried is still held responsible  for it in our society. For the way she’s dressed or her lifestyles or for that matter one wrong decision she made on that   very day of choosing to board in to that bus or cab. rapeprotestBut I wonder won’t these psycho rape a woman in Burkha? They will definitely. Coz the problem is not related to how a girl is dressed the problem is how she is treated by the men in society, their mentality which is so sick. These beasts are so desperate and mentally ill that they don’t even spare girls of age 3 or 4. The only reason I can see is they have no fear of law. They don’t even think once before committing such crime as they know even if they get caught they can spend their entire lives in prison with free food at doorstep and shelter. And what the victim is left with? A life which she can either spend in helping other victims and become a social-worker or just give up.

The only way we can stop or minimize this crime is to have torturous punishment, that no one will ever dare to even think about.

Coz I was born this way


“Emotional, stubborn, short-tempered, bi-polar….” I have many adjectives and many good ones too ;) . The good or the bad, they all are part of me, they make my nature, they make me as an individual and different. Some can adjust with them others cannot. Those who accept me as I am become my friends, forever; those who don’t, well it’s their problem. I’m good with those who are good to me, and others … they don’t really exist for me.

I don’t like to waste my weekends sitting idle at home. I’m fun-loving person who loves to party, go out with friends, explore new places. I love to go shopping, get dressed nicely and can’t stand people with horrible dressing-sense. I may spend handsome amount on a dress and may not wear it for even once if I don’t like it anymore. And like many girls I want something new for every occasion. I’m not so foodie but don’t like to visit the same restaurant every time.

I think too much and act weird sometimes. I can forgive my enemies but cannot forget what they did to me. I cannot pretend to be good if I don’t like someone. And if I like someone I tell them upfront.I love to pamper my friends (and the special friend too :) ) and love to get pampered.  I don’t talk to strangers and want others to approach me. And then you think I have an attitude problem? Well, that’s the way I am. Love selflessly and hate completely.

My dad keeps telling me to change, have control on my anger. May be he’s not completely wrong, but if I change myself then I won’t be myself anymore. I won’t be me and I don’t wanna lose ME. I ain’t a bad girl and even if I do, I was born this way.

Mirage – Break Free


Suddenly I realized I have been living very restricted life. I had my rules and I had been following them, may be just to protect myself from the bad world out there or may be just to keep my image clean. But what’s the use? Right now I’m all alone and I’m certainly not happy about it.

It’s different world here in US than in India. People are open-minded (it can be little debatable), they are more casual about few things and basically they don’t care what you are doing. This is the perfect place for me to live my life the way I want. Hell with the society, hell with the rules and now I’ll not stop myself from loving someone…. someone else.

Mirage – Trying to move on


When you are staying away from your family, in altogether different country, the people around you are the only family. I left my family behind, I left the person I loved so much…sorry I love so much. I have all the reasons to be upset, sit and cry but who’ll listen to my cry, who’ll spend his/her precious time in consoling me or entertain me? No one actually. So I have decided not to do any of this. I sure wanna make friends but don’t wanna open all the chapters of my life in front of any body and get emotionally attached and get hurt. I’ll be the one taking care of myself, so there’s no scope for any sorrow or regret. I’m going to live my life happily, may be at times it’ll need me do stupid things but I’m gonna do all it takes to keep myself happy. No one likes to see frown face, even I won’t like to see that in mirror. So yes, I’m going to be happy.

Mirage – Continues


It’s been more than 4 months I haven’t seen him..I haven’t even talked to him, not even had a chat. But there hasn’t been a single day that I didn’t miss him. Everyday, every moment, every single second his on my mind. I only know how I’m controlling myself. It’s hard not to message him when I see him online or not call him when I have his number stored in my mobile. But even he didn’t tried to contact me. I guess he doesn’t want to make it happen. He is deliberately avoiding me. But he can at least talk to me as a friend.

I think now even I should move on. Is it possible for me? No doubt it’s the most difficult thing for me right now but he left me with no option. The more I try to catch the more it seems to go away. I’ll leave it to destiny now. I’m too tired to fight with my fate.

Note: I had been writing this series of fictional story. For some reason I had discontinued it. Thanks to Diana, who writes the other side of the story, for getting me back with it.

Happy to be single….


I have been an emotional fool all these years but this corporate world has taught me so much that now I choose my friends wisely. “Man is a social animal” and yes I’m a human being and I love to socialize. But the problem comes when there is an attachment with people. Expectations, dependencies make you weak. Especially when you are emotionally dependent on someone. That person can be a friend or someone special. But when emotions come it screws everything.

They say “happiness lies within”… *conditions apply. It can only be within yourself as long as you are not emotionally attached to anyone. ‘Today he didn’t talk to me, I’m feeling sad’. ‘She fought with me, now my entire day is spoiled’. How often does this happen to you? If you are in a relationship then the frequency is much higher. You skip your meal, you can not sleep at night, you can’t focus on your tasks, you feel lonely, dealing with headache after crying all night; all because you are emotionally dependent on others.

I have experienced both, seen my friends going through all the torture and I’m so enjoying my single-hood now. No need to answer calls at absurd times, no restrictions, no need to inform about my whereabouts and no explanations for any of my actions, no fights over which movie to watch or where to eat, no jealousy or room for doubts. And most important…no dramas. Live your life the way you want and let others live too ;).

Like few of my posts even this gonna invite lotsa controversies but as I always say, it’s my space and I believe I have freedom to write what I feel is right. And now I feel “Happy to be single :)”